Paparazzi

Since posting my video, the paparazzi has been beating down my door requesting photographs and interviews. Really, it is becoming tedious. My schedule is busy now meeting with agents, public relations, and stylists. I simply cannot be interviewed by both Doggertainment Tonight and Access Doggywood on the same night. I have a photo shoot with Dogsquire magazine and then I will meet with Matt Lauer on the Today Show for an interview next week. Honestly, I would prefer Meredith Vieira or Ann Curry.

Because of the chaos in my life, I decided to hire a body guard. Meet Donald. He has extra toes and is good at punching out (or scratching) the cameramen who get too close to me. He's loud and he's not afraid to rough people up. In fact, he gets so into it, he forgets who he is supposed to protect and tries to rough me up. He's not too bright. This is photo of him pushing away someone from the paparazzi who was trying to take a picture of me while I pooped in my backyard. Does anyone have respect for privacy these days? Now I can empathize with Brittany Spears. I think I call her for drinks.